"The Easy Way to Get Your Best UK Mortgage" |
|
|
|
|
|
|
||||||
|
|
How to get a really Bad Mortgage Deal
Your 5 easy steps
Getting a mortgage is
probably the most expensive purchase anyone will make. Here's
how to get a really bad deal.
Step 1: First Stop, Call Your Bank.
We’ll assume that your bank is one of the 99% that have recently jumped on the mortgages bandwagon. (In case you didn’t know, banks selling mortgages is a fairly new thing).
It’s probably best to wait until you’re feeling particularly dumb. Ready? OK, now give them a call.
Be flattered by the sudden interest you get from them. What a nice change from when there was that unfortunate little problem with the overdraft…
Now don’t ask questions about whether theirs is the best deal you could really get. Don't listen as they rush through the bit they're obliged to say ie that they are only selling their own mortgages! But do get excited when they mention their tempting sign up gifts - like a pen with their logo on it. Or a book token. Or even a cash gift like £250. Wow!
That's right. You’ve just got to sign up to their deal.
Then to celebrate you can buy yourself some cheap champagne. We say cheap because the mortgage you’ve just got from your bank will most likely have cost you many, many thousands of pounds more than it should have.
So you’ll need to start cutting down on any luxuries right now and start saving for when you’re old and that much poorer than necessary … Enjoy!
Step 2: Don’t Shop Around
You really should get three quotes before you buy anything of value. But hey this is only a boring old mortgage right?
So don’t start by checking out the mortgage best buy tables. It’s far too much hassle. Remember you’re only a dumb consumer.
You don’t want to see the best mortgages deals that are available to you at the moment. It’s too much trouble to spend a few minutes checking out websites with best buy tables or your weekend newspaper.
Step 3: Don’t Worry About The Extra Fees Or Tie Ins.
Assuming you bother with the best buy tables, choose the top placed mortgage with the surprisingly low interest rate. "Amazing - only 2%". Without any suspicion call the nice mortgage lender.
Trust them totally. They have your best interests at heart. Unscrupulous? No way. These guys wear suits and ties! They’re not simply trying to lure you in with this great sounding deal.
Anyway what kind of trap could there possibly be? Could it possibly be the “let’s get them in the door with a low sounding interest-rate. Then hit them later with additional fees and expensive tie ins".
Er, what kind of fees? Things like rip off “arrangement fees”, “administration fees”, “valuation fees”, the “fat cat directors fees”. Frankly any fees they can get away with.
Er, what kind of tie ins? Oh, ones like: you can’t move your mortgage away from them for years - during which time they can charge you whatever interest rate they feel like. That kind of stuff.
It might be cheaper to get a mortgage with a higher interest rate but lower sign up fees and fewer tie ins. But that’s far too clever, right?
Step 4: Get Ripped Off With Your Mortgage Insurance
This is a easy one. It goes like this. All you need to do is get a mortgage with insurance "packaged in".Got that? No? OK, let’s try again: Just agree to take your home insurance from your mortgage lender.
Most lenders try to offer it. It’s probably optional. But don’t even ask. Just take it. (Remember, you’re going for a bad deal).
Don’t
worry that the cost of home insurance from mortgage companies
is usually much higher than from insurance
companies – sometimes by a factor of three.
You
could get much cheaper home insurance from an insurance company.
But why worry? Instead, why not burn some money for
a laugh?
Step 5: Don’t Get A Free Quote From A Mortgage Adviser.
Say
you’ve actually managed to get an offer from a mortgage
lender. Well done. Game over.
Don’t bother asking a mortgage broker to see
if they can do better for you.
OK, you could easily find a broker by simply picking up your yellow pages or going online. But let’s face it; it’s better if you rely on yourself as the expert. Right?
After
all. If you buy a used car would you bother asking the opinion
of someone who knew something about cars? Nah. You’d
kick the tires and trust your gut feeling, wouldn’t
you?
The
fact that brokers advise on a no obligation
basis, and might save you a shed load of money is beside the
point.
So
what if they can save you a lot of time and effort by quickly
checking the entire market for you while you twiddle your
thumbs.
Nope.
Just go ahead and sign up to the mortgage deal without this
safety check.
Congratulations. You now know the 5 steps to getting a bad deal
OK, to be serious, rather than signing up to the mortgage
deal without the safety check of asking a
mortgage adviser, we would strongly recommend you do this.
We can put you in contact with one here but why not get some quotes first from your bank or other mortgage lenders? You can come back later to get a free quote by filling in the form below. Then you can play spot the difference !
|
|
